look at my wrists
and than tell me again, everything's getting better












i know you lie

 

i'm an emotional wreck

and i fucking hate it!!

and all i can think is: die, die, die, die, die, die, die,die, die, die, die, die, die, die, die!!!

it seemed

 like my life is a little trashily thing, 

'cause neither a man nor a beast 

wanted to take it from me

i miss feeling numb

the last way out of this fucking shit!

when you're scared of looking in the mirror

my mirror called me fattie 

when standing up in the mornig is getting the hardest act of the day

 i'm doing it less, but i'm doing it deeper

when you cant wake up from the never-ending nightmare

...when you look in the mirror and you are disgusted.
you just see fat.
and you just want to die...

...waiting... 

...waiting for the fucking end...

 everything is shitty. even my best friend leaves things unsaid to me. i'm a nothing, i'm mud. i ate too much so i'll become fat. fatter than now.
and all i think is: just one cut. just pop a few pills... and everything would be... gone..

ate too much today.
there is so much fat...
saturday i'll weigh myself again ... but i'm scared of my scale

 I hate...

...my fucking...






   






...own body!!!

i'm just tired.
everyday.
everytime i wake up i'm tired again.
i just want to sleep.
for the rest of my life.

just sleeping... never stop dreaming..

i'm scared of being alone, but going with my friends is harder.
i hate being lonely, but i hate being in a big crowd too.
eveything is so fucking hard. everything is so... strange...

there is one thing i have to do: lose weight!
my body is so disgusting! i cant stand this shit!

life sucks!
eating sucks!
i cant stand it anymore!